Feedback Unleashed: The Art of Giving & Receiving Hard Feedback

Feedback: A CEO’s Story

In my last job I worked closely with Jeremy Andrus, the CEO of Traeger, father of 6, and prolific investor and donor, among many other things.

We were discussing feedback, in which he had just received 360 feedback from literally every person in the company. As you can imagine there was a lot there. What he said struck me:

“I love getting feedback. The trouble is I can’t change overnight – I am who I am, so I’ll choose something to focus on and gradually change that.”

At first I was dumbstruck. Wouldn’t this successful person want to please everyone? Doesn’t he value all of this input?

After 24 hours of thinking about this it hit me how profound this was. Every employee knows him, and every person has different preferences on what they would like him to be. But we really can’t reinvent ourselves suddenly. Rather than try to change everything about ourselves, it’s instead best to lean into who we are and make gradual improvements over time.

How to Receive Feedback like a Pro

Jeremy is a great example of how to receive and implement feedback. Take a common theme, pair it with something you can actually change and focus on that.

Let me share some feedback I have received over the years and what I did about it (with hopefully something that’s helpful for you!):

• “You’re not a good presenter” – I joined Toastmasters International, a group with chapters all over the world, and learned how to be a present and speak in public like a professional.
• “You could be more professional in your writing” – I re-read each email I was going to send twice over before sending, often catching typos or incomplete thoughts.
• “You could be more prepared for meetings” – I started preparing agendas for meetings and doing a lot of the pre-work necessary to make my meetings run smoothly (see our article on How to Run Meetings that Don’t Stink).
• “Your report didn’t spark change…” – I read this book on Storytelling with Data and dramatically changed how I do any report (read more on 5 Ways to Better Tell Stories with Data)
• “You need new, better ideas” – I started looking beyond my category/industry and paired this with pre-wiring ideas.

Looking back I have made significant areas of improvement in my professional life through receiving feedback, and have learned that focusing in one area is far better than trying to completely change everything.

How to Give Feedback to Your Boss or Executives

Yes, you read that right. Besides just receiving feedback you should be giving it freely. Most feedback advice tends to be focused on giving feedback to peers or those who report to you. However the most nuanced (and difficult) type of feedback is that which you give to your superiors, so we’re going to start there.

Here’s three important pieces to remember when giving feedback to superiors:

1. Think 30 days out. Imagine your perfect work environment and whatever piece of feedback you’re giving with how that affects it. What will they be able to change within 30 days? Is this realistic? If not, then reconsider sharing or break your grievance down into a more bite-sized piece.
2. Give it in real time. Be proactive here and don’t wait for your next 1:1 or quarterly meeting. Feedback is more useful in the present.
3. Remember they are people. They are just like you and I; they will think about the feedback you give them and internalize it. No need to be overly critical, as they cannot change overnight.

I have found that since so few people give feedback to executives, having the courage to give it makes you stand out, identifies you as a person to be trusted/listened to, and often puts you in consideration for faster promotions.

A quick example – the leadership team (which I was a part of) was rolling out the company strategy for the year. We had a designer who sent us a note with a helpful suggestion to add something to it. We did. We then started to include him in future discussions. None of us certainly didn’t saw his feedback as critical; if anything we found it helpful and liked that he was willing to send it.

Now what do you do if it’s more personal feedback? For example:

• The executive treats people poorly.
• The executive micromanages and causes everything to move slowly.
• The executive hires his friends/family who are ill-suited for positions.

In this case, you should definitely bring it to their attention (rather than just discuss behind his/her back), but should NOT speak to it generally but instead discuss it specifically. In the micromanaging example, it would be helpful to take a recent project, break it down, and show the delays caused by the executive. It’s quantifiable and objective. When the project finishes, take a couple of minutes and share it with them. I’ll also say for feedback like this it should always be in-person, not an email or message. This helps with understanding and you may gain a better perspective for why he or she acts the way they do.

Giving Feedback to Coworkers: The TAT Rule

Feedback is a gift that should be given freely. The best feedback is thoughtful, timely, and actionable (TAT).

Feedback should be given remembering the TAT rule (Thoughtful, Actionable, Timely)

Thoughtful. Consider your feedback before giving it (duh!). Beyond that, consider how useful the feedback is. The worst kind of feedback I have received from coworkers is something like “You could do more research.” The best kind of feedback looks more like this: “I noticed you did a focus group for your research, but did you consider doing a survey as well? I think that would have made it more well-rounded.” That’s thoughtful and forces the giver to step into their shoes before giving it.

Actionable. Consider what the person receiving feedback can actually do. If your feedback is “You need better attention to detail” there’s not much to do with that. Similar to the advice for executives, you should imagine what working with this person looks like 30 days from giving the feedback. Instead of saying “You need better attention to detail” it should be “Here’s a few of your latest emails to our client that have typos in them. Could you please ensure future emails don’t have typos by re-reading them before you send them?” That’s actionable.

Timely. Use a 1-day rule with feedback: Always give feedback within a day of it coming to your attention. For example, I recently had a coworker who gave a presentation in a meeting. During the meeting in my notes I wrote some feedback for him, and as soon as the meeting got over I thanked him for his presentation and shared my thoughts. He was so grateful, and in his follow-up to the team he addressed my recommended changes. He grew and the company benefited.

In Conclusion

Don’t be afraid to provide feedback to others, especially coworkers. In my career the feedback I have received has been life-changing, for example what was once a weak point in presenting data is now strong enough to teach an MBA course on it (see my crazy story of being an adjunct professor).

While you shouldn’t be overly critical, if you follow the TAT Rule (Thoughtful, Actionable, Timely) you should be perceived as a giver and builder. Best of luck in your journey to be an artful giver of feedback!